Roach's Mental Notes
by DestineyTot
Summary: Ever wonder what's really going through Roach's mind during his time with the Task Force? Well, its hard to tell when he's surrounded by his not-so-sane teammates. Life has never been so confusing for the young Sergeant.
1. He Is Not The Same Man

_READ THIS FIRST! IMPORTANT INFO! _**Just recently got into MW2 again (I've had the game since April...) and I realized just how much I adored Roach after reading some fanfics! Everyone seems to make his personality sort've "boyish" and "crude" and I can definitely see him like that. **

**Now, this isn't a 'write down your thoughts' diary. It's Roach's mental thoughts. He can be thinking about this stuff and doing it at the same time. So don't get it mixed up while reading as it may be very confusing thinking he's writing this down while shooting some poor Tango...**

* * *

**Roach's Mental Notes**

* * *

_**August 7th, 2016**_

**05:45**

Well, I'm awake now...and I seem to have a dilemma...

I _really_ have to pee...but I'm _really_ comfortable right now and I don't want to get up from my cot this early. I'm all warm and snug and I know that if I get up to use the bathroom and come back to my cot, it just won't have that same degree of warmth and comfort...Yeah, I _really_ have a problem on my hands.

Why can't a person be able to use the bathroom and sleep at the same time? That's something scientists really need to start thinking about now days. I mean, c'mon...its a great idea, really. It sounds really stupid, but its actually genious.

**05:54**

I wonder who else writes about having to pee...

**05:57**

...Maybe Ghost does...?

**06:03**

Huh...maybe I should get Meat or Worm to carry me to the bathroom instead...they're always looking out for me here and there. They shouldn't mind too much.

But wait a second...that would still mean I'd have to leave my bed. Not only to use the bathroom, but to wake Meat or Worm up...oh man...fuck my life...

**06:11**

I can think of only one other solution. But that would not only mean that I'd have to get up, but I'd also have to clean my bed-sheets. Gosh, when did life become so hard?

**06:16**

FINE! I'll leave my nice, comfy bed and go use the stupid bathroom. Jesus Christ, I swear...I wish nature would stupid fucking calling. Oh well...

Nature is such a bitch.

**06:25**

Okay, so I did my thing and now I'm cold. I suppose I might as well get up. It's about time, anyway...I don't want Meat pouring ice-water on my head again. That was _horrible_...

It really sucks being FNG. I wonder if any of the other guys had it as bad as me. I've never been so tired of practical jokes in my life. And, dude, where did I get my call-sign from? Seriously. _Roach_? Who the hell is called Roach? Everyone else's call-sign aren't that bad. I actually think Ghost's is kinda cool...Meat, Worm, and Scarecrow aren't so bad...but me?

Roach. Goddamn.

**07:01**

Everyone is awake now. We're all in the mess hall. I've been thinking about my call-sign. I guess it ain't _that_ bad, being reffered to as a cockroach. I mean, they could've called me Cock...now _that_ would've been bad. I could only imagine how bad my life would've been then. Meat and the others would've never let that go.

**07:15**

I'm sitting here, trying to figure out what day of the week it is. I've completely lost track of the weekdays. I guess I'll ask Captain Mactavish.

**07: 19**

"Captain?" He looks up from the coffee he's drinking. Ghost is sitting across from him, staring at me. Well, I'm not _exactly _sure if he is, since he wears those sunglasses and mask all the time. I bet he even wears that crap to bed and that just can't help but kinda make you wonder what people do in their free time, whenever no one else is watching and its just them in the room and they're completely themselves and why is this thought so long? I'm getting off track. "What day is it?"

"It's August 7th, Roach. Why?" He asks me in that thick Scottish accent.

I shake my head. "No, I mean, what day of the week is it? Is it Monday or Tuesday or what?"

"Hmmm..." He sits there in deep thought, rubbing his chin. For god's sake, I only asked what day of the week it was, not what the sqaure root of pie was. He finally decides on an answer. "It's the day after yesterday, and the day before tomorrow. That is, If Tomorrow Never Dies." He ends the sentence with a smile.

"W-What?" I am very confused right now. I don't understand what the Captain's getting at...

Ghost pipes in, in a sing-songy voice. "If tomorrow dies, then the world will end today. But I thought the world was going to end The Day After Tomorrow."

I can't believe my eyes (or my ears) as Captain Mactavish continues, singing along. "Well, no matter when the world will end, at least Yesterday all my troubles seemed so far away."

Ghost all of a sudden bursts out, leaning over the table. "But suddenly, you're not half the man you used to be?"

I'm starting to think that I'm still asleep and this is all one bizzare nightmare. Captain Mactavish almost climbs onto the table himself, singing out. "There's a shadow hanging over me!"

Ghost draws back, like he's offended or something, which is strange. But then again, after seeing all that happen, I can't really call anything strange anymore. I can see him scowling through his mask. "Then I suggest you buy more lamps."

**07:39**

I realize that the attention has been drawn away from me and I sneakily escape from them, not wanting to look back. That had to the strangest expirience I've had with the Task Force so far. It kinda makes me wonder if the Captain's seen one two many tragedies and is going off the deep end. Ghost, too, but it seems way stranger with the Captain, considering he's some sort of bad ass...

I wonder what Meat and the guys are doing?

**07:46**

"Meat." I acknowledge, plopping down beside him and Worm at the table.

"Well, the cockroach decided to show its face. The lights too bright for you, Roach?" Meat gives my shoulder a nudge and I glare at him. Sometimes I really do hate him with the intensity of a thousand burning deserts.

"Shut up, ass. What day is it?" I ask crankily.

"Today is Augu-" Worm begins.

I shut him up, already knowing what he was gonna say. "No, what day of the week?" I feel like I've asked this a million times already. "Y'know? Day of the week?"

Rocket, who's sitting across from us with Scarecrow, speaks up first. "It's Tuesday!"

I'm about to sigh a breath of relief, but then I hear Worm speaking up. "No, its Friday you idiot."

"It is?" I ask and he nods. Then I see Meat shaking his head.

"No, you're all wrong. It's Sunday." He seems fairly confident about his answer.

I'm am completely confused. My head is hurting and its like I can feel the rusty gears grinding in my brain. I have no idea what day of the week it is and it's realling pissing me off for some reason.

Must be the OCD.

**09:50**

General Shepherd called us in for a meeting. Something about some Allen guy, KIA, Moscow, Russia, blah, blah, blah...

I don't know why, but it feels like that man is going to kill me someday...

Must be my imagination?

**10:34**

Well, the meetings over. Looks like that Allen guy was undercover or something and he got killed and now America is being accused of slaughtering innocent Russians and a war is very inevitable now. Oh well, doesn't affect my life any.

Now we have to go look for some in Brazil named Alejandro Rojas. Hmm...I can't help but think of that one song by Lady Gaga, Alejandro.

I walk out of the room, quietly singing. "Don't call my name, don't call my name, Alejandro. I'm not your babe, I'm not your babe, Fernando. Don't wanna kiss, don't wanna touch. Just smoke one cigarette and hush. Don't call my name, don't call my name Roberto. Alejandro, Alejandro, Ale-Alejandro, Ale-Ale-"

Its then that I notice that Ghost is staring at me weirdly. What? He can sing some random song out of nonwhere, but I can't? I'm tempted to yell at him, but being my superior, I hold my tongue.

**10:38**

I wonder if I'm any less of a man because I listen to Lady Gaga? All of a sudden, I remembered what Captain Mactavish and Ghost were singing earlier. _But suddenly, you're not half the man you used to be?_

You think they were reffering to me? How did they know I'd be thinking about this later on?

...The Captain and Ghost truly are remarkable.

**13:21**

We're on board the pave low now, heading towards Brazil. I swear, this day is dragging by painfully slow. Meat, Royce, and Chemo are talking about some movie..."The Hangover"? I'm not sure.

"No, seriously! There was a tiger in the bathroom and they found a baby in the cabinet!" Meat droned on, overly excited.

"No way!" Chemo yells at him. "You're kidding me!"

"Serious as a heart attack! They steal a police car, their friends marries a stripper, and one of them even gets punched out by Mike Tyson!"

"Aw, shit man! That movie sounds awesome! Why haven't I ever seen it before?" Chemo replies.

They continue on babbling about the movie. I don't know who this 'Stu' guy is...but I want to strangle him with a phone cord.

**14:01**

We're in Brazil. We're following these guys in a van because they seem to know where this 'Alejandro' guy was. "Alejandro, Alejan- DAMNIT!" I curse out loud. The driver looks at me warily, as if my insanity isn't in tact. I merely brush him off and take to staring out the window.

The van stopped now and two guys are talking to some skinny dude. Oh shit. He just pulled out a gun.

**14:02**

So that's what brains looks like?

**14:04**

So I'm chasing that guy down with Captain Mactavish. The streets were peaceful about 2 minutes ago, but now everyone is running around screaming and there's fire everywhere. I wonder how that happened so quick?

The Captain tells me to take a non-lethal shot, so I just shoot the poor sap in the leg. Roach 1, Unlucky Bitch 0.

**14:10**

Captain Mactavish and Ghost are in the back of the truck doing what I think is torturing the guy with car jumpers. Classic. It's just me, Meat, and Royce now. I wonder where Chemo went?

Great. So we're after that Alejandro guy now. When I find that fucker, I'm going to beat his ass because all this work is definitely not worth it.

Royce just told Meat to clear out the civvies in the favela. He jumps down and proceeds to yell like a banshee and fire his gun in the air. _Totally _Meat. Making himself look like a jackass. But it seems to have worked, so I guess we're fine. Hey, wait, who are those guys on the roof-tops? They weren't there before...

**14:15**

Those guys have guns! So I guess that means I shoot them? Yeah, that sounds about right.

We're working our way through the favela and all of a sudden I hear Royce say Meat's down...I hope it ain't lethal or anything, but then again Meat kinda deserves getting shot in the ass. Consider it payback for all the practical jokes he pulled on me. Karma is a bitch.

Maybe he should start watching "My Name is Earl". That show could've taught him a thing or two.

**14:27**

Okay, out of the those slums now and I'm all alone. Captain Mactavish and Ghost are yelling maniacally in my headset to catch Rojas. I've taken to calling him that instead, so I don't start singing again. I definitely don't need to be singing right now.

These people are very mean. I haven't done a single thing to them and they're shooting me and telling me to go home. Some lady was throwing her dishes at me from her window. One of them cracked me upside the head and now I have a headache. Great.

Running up to the roofs in the favela...Man, this is tough...

**14:45**

Why does Captain Mactavish make me do everything? Why does Ghost, Meat, Royce and the others get to sit back and relax? What the hell are they doing? Having tea and crumpets? I think NOT! When I get back, I'm going to demand to know why I'm subject to all the work.

Ugh, whatever...I'm at the top of the favela now and I can see this guy running along the rooftops. 'Aw shit...he's gonna get away...'

"No he's not." I freaked out a little because for a second, I thought Captain Mactavish was reading my mind, but then I realized it was just Ghost saying it out loud. Oh, silly me. The Captain bursts from the window in slow-mo (How did he make it slow-mo? The world is strange...) and smashes that guy into the car below.

...I wonder if Mactavish and Neo are related?

**15:00**

Well, we got that Rojas guy, so I guess we're going home now.

"Bullocks!" I heard Ghost yell into his reciever. "Commands got their heads up thier arse."

Oh, you are shitting me...we're stranded in Brazil with a bunch of crazy people wanting to kill us and we don't have a RIDE?

"I know a guy. Is there a nearby payphone? Do those still exist?" Captain Mactavish asks.

Huh...payphone...we've got some of the most hitech means of communication in the world and this guy wants to use a payphone? What a confusing day this is...

I just hope it doesn't get any worse than it is.

* * *

**Poor, poor Roach is having a weird/terrible day. Please, please review and tell me if you like! If enough people like this and review, I'll continue into "The Hornet's Next" mission! **

_**Sgt. Foley: **_**RAMIREZ! Tell the readers to review this story immediatly if they want the next chapter to be posted! Oh, and GET ME SOME KOOL-AID!**

_**Ramirez: **_**-sigh- Please review everyone...for poor people like me and Roach who have to do EVERYTHING.**


	2. He Does All The Work

_READ FIRST! IMPORTANT INFO! _**So...I got more reviews than I thought I would, so now I'm going on with "The Hornets Nest" mission. You guys have to forgive me for the typos. I don't have Microsoft Word on my comp and I have to use Wordpad. But I'll try my best to avoid any mistakes!**

**LOL, I felt kinda weird listening to the band I was whenever writing this. If you must know, I was listening to **_**Papa Roach**_**. **_**Between Angels and Insects**_** is such a kick-ass song! Listen to it!**

* * *

_**Roach's Mental Notes**_

* * *

_**August 7th, 2016**_

**15:25**

Captain Mactavish called some guy named Nikolai. Oh, and whaddiya know? Chemo is back all of a sudden. Where did he go, by the way?

"Nikolai we're at the top of the favela!" The Captain yelled into his headset. See? Why didn't he just use that instead of the stupid payphone...

So it turns out we STILL have quite a ways to go to get to the LZ. Oh, and whaddiya know? More tangos...

**15:29**

At least we're back together. And I'm not having to do all the work. Some guys just drove up in a truck. Oh, they have a mini-gun? _Nice_.

Fuck my life.

**15:35**

"Roach! Take out that machine-gunner!" Captain Mactavish yells into my ear. We're standing side-by-side and its not even that loud and he yells into my ear like a banshee. What happened to talking normally anymore?

"Alright, alright..." I muttered lazily back. Hey...its been a long day. And, hell, I am _tired_. I shoot the guy on the back f the truck and I hear the order for us to move up. I see Chemo running nearby and I waltz up behind him. "Where the hell we're you?" I yell.

He keeps running, but replies nonetheless. "Oh, I was having tea and crumpets with the Captain and Ghost. Meat and Royce were there, too. Where were you?"

I stared wide-mouthed at him, my brain literally short-circuiting. So I WAS right? I had to do all that work while they sat and took a _break_? Jesus Christ, what has the 141 came to? They should just call it the Task Foce Roach. That'd make more sense...

**15:47**

We're getting closer to the roofs now. Me and the Captain are hiding behind some old car, taking fire from both sides. All of a sudden, I see the car catch on fire and pretty much know whats coming. Too bad my brain can't work as fast as my mind.

It explodes, sending me flying through the air and for a second, all I could think was, "Kewl." because I was flying in slow motion like from an action movie. But then my head smashes into the cement road and then its not so kewl anymore.

I am a very lame individual. And half the man I used to be.

I look up, one of my eyes blinded with blood and see that the Captain merely flinched for a second and went straight back to shooting. Instant recovery for the lose. Royce is yanking me back up by my arm. "Come on Roach! Man up!" He yells at me, handing me my gun.

Let's see you man up after being tossed through the air like a rag-doll, idiot. It's not as easy as it looks.

**16:02**

Nikolai tried to land in a wide-spot for us, but some freaking tangos spawned outta nowhere, so now we have to climb onto the rooftops to get to the new LZ.

I watched wide-eyed as the Captain, Ghost, and the others jumped up onto the roof like they were ninjas or something.

...Did I ever tell you that I couldn't jump? Worth shit.

The Captain, luckily, helps hoist me up so all I have to do now is run. I don't risk jumping across the roof-tops so I tiptoe quickly across the boards connecting them. I can see Nikolai's pave low now and I'm just thinking that now I can finally take a well-deserved nap. But then I see _it_. Satan in gymnastic form.

There's a _huge_ gap between this building and the next and I'm not so sure about that 20 drop down. I see The Captain and others jump across it with ease, so I'm thinking that if they can do it, I can. I take a deep breath and sprint towards the edge and will myself out into the air with everything I have. But my legs go retarded and soon I'm spiraling downward.

My hand catches the edge of the rooftops and its on of those pseudo-slow-mo moments again. I see Captain Mactavish diving for me, hand extended. "Roach!"

"Aw, shit, shit. shit,. help me!" I call out, but his hand misses mine completely and soon I'm tumbling downward towards the ground. Goodbye cruel world.

**16:10**

I had a strange dream. Something popped up in my vision. At first it was unclear, blurry at first, but then it cleared up.

I then realized that god was giving me words of wisdom. He's telling me how much a single Javelin missle costs. Okay, thats cool. I don't think I could ever buy one myself, but thanks for the info anyway.

**16:15**

I'm slowly coming to and I realize that I'm not dead. I survived a fall that should've snapped my spine in half and I can hear Captain Mactavish yelling into my headset. "Roach! Roach! Get up, Roach!"

Did I mention my head was pounding me?

"Roach, we can see you from the chopper. Enemy militia is closing in on you, there's dozens of them!" Ghost is yelling at me, too. Great.

"Head to the rooftops, Roach!" Captain Mactavish pipes back in. "We can't get you from there!"

**16:18**

I'm sprinting with energy I thought I never had. I thought I was Superman. I thought I was Captain America. Fuck, I'd kick Captain America's ass. I'm Roach, bitch.

**16:20**

You ever see the one Green Day video? I think it was 21 Guns or something like that. This girl and guy are randomly standing in this room and then all of a sudden, a bunch of bullets starts whizzing by and busting everything to hell, but they're not getting shot.

Well, that's kind've whats going on now.

**16:22**

The Captain tells me that they're running low on fumes and I only have 30 seconds now. I don't think now is the time for mindless thinking.

I slid down this rooftop and kind've busted through the window like in a movie or something. Hmm...I notice that I refer to my life as a movie a lot. You think someone is secretly directing all this and at the end of the day, they're gonna walk out from behind a curtain and be all like, "That's a wrap! Nice job on those stunts, Roach!" I mean, if you think about it, it actually makes a lot of sense.

Oh, wait...I'm doing it again...mindless thinking...

The pave low is _right_ in front of me now. The Captain is telling me to jump for it.

To jump from a high-ass cliff onto a dangling ladder that doesn't even look stable.

'Legs, don't get retarded on me again...' I pray to myself. With everything left in me, I jump for the ladder. And by some ungodly chance, I actually make it. _Damn_. I really am bad-ass.

"He made it!" Captain Mactavish yells to the others.

"Where to, my friend?" Nikolai asks in his thick Russian accent.

"Just get us to the sub..." Mactavish replies.

Wait...what _fucking_ sub? I was gonna take a goddamn nap! And they're telling me that we're going to a sub? What the hell are these guys? How do they keep freaking going like they do?

Oh, that's _right_. I do ALL of the work.

**18:05**

I am incredibly tired now. But the Captain tells me that we don't start our next mission until tomorrow morning. Something about an oilrig and Prisoner number 627...I could really care less now.

I'm just going to lie here in my hammock and sleep. Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep, sle-

"COCKROACH!"

I jump and end up smashing my head into the ceiling of the room. Why did I chose top hammock?

Then I feel something smash into my face. It was awfully soft, but it was also really fucking irritating. I realize that Meat, who's limping by the bunk, hit me with it.

"Did I squish it?" He asked after I removed the pillow. I glared hard at him, resisting the _strong _urge to stick my tongue out at him like a 5-year old.

"Hey Meat. Your _ass_ looks _great_." I mutter sarcastically, staring at his bandaged wounds.

"Shut up, bug." He tugs on the edge of the hammock and sends it swinging. I nearly fall off. "If you don't eat now, then you're not eating anytime soon tomorrow."

Right now, I could care less about food. I wanted sleep. "Food is for fat people." I tell him, then go to lay back down.

"Sleeping is for pussies." He retorts and flips the hammock, making me fall onto the steel flooring. "Now come and eat, lazy-ass."

...Sometimes I really do hate Meat with the intensity of a thousand burning deserts. Did I tell you that yet?

**18:11**

I sitting at a table now in a make-shift cafeteria in the sub. I'm just staring blank-eyed at my food and I can't stop keeping my head from bobbing up and down. I am so _tired_...

I feel something slap down on the table hard and it makes a shark _clink! _noise, hurting my ears. The screeching of two chairs against steel tempts me to look up. _I swear to god, if that's Meat..._

"Looking tired, Roach?" I hear the Scottish accent and I'm a little relieved to see that its merely the Captain and Ghost.

Sometimes I wonder if they're capable of doing anything without each other. They're like twins almost...not in relation or anything, but how they kinda follow each other around...is it weird of me to be thinking about this sort of thing?

"Completely..." I say the word, but it comes out, sounding like mush. Ghost laughs at me. "Shut up." I snapped back. Usually a person wouldn't even dare talk to their superirors like that, but for some reason, Captain Mactavish and Ghost just really took a liking to me. And I had to say that I liked them a hella lot better then some other guys in the 141.

The Captain pats me on the back. "Ah, well...eat now, sleep tonight, you'll be fine in the morning." A grin stupidly at the thought of sleep and force myself to finish my food quickly.

**21:32**

It's so late. I'm so sleepy. But I _can't _sleep.

You ever get those gut feelings? Y'know, how people talk about instinct and crap? Yeah...I'm getting one of those feelings right now.

I don't know why, but it feels like I'm going to die in about 4, maybe 5 days from now. In some sort of fiery pit.

Not only that, but I've been having these really bad gut feelings about Ghost. I can't explain it. I feel like someone's going to take a .44 Magnum and shoot him point blank...

...Must be my imagination?

**21:56**

...I need to pee now. _Shit_.

* * *

**Oh, poor Roach! He and Ghost's death in "Loose Ends" made my cry! I HATE Shepherd...whenever I threw that knife into his eye, I was like "FffuuuuuuuuckYESSSSSSSSSSS! Revenge **_**is **_**a GHOST!" I'm still hoping that Ghost comes back in MW3, but we all know that Roach did die...who could survive getting hurt in an explosion, shot point blank by a magnum, them burned to death?**

**At least with Ghost, he has a chance. Maybe Shepherd wasn't aiming all too good. And you do know that they put **_**hardly any **_**gas on Ghost...Maybe Toad and Archer, the snipers, saved him? I hope so...BUT IMMA MISS ROACH! NOOOOOOO! **

*Errrrherrrmmmmmm* **Please review! Leave luvs for Roach cuz god knows he needs them right now!**


	3. He Is Thinking Strange Thoughts

_REPLY TO JACOB'S QUESTION _**Yeah, I noticed that Shepherd might not have lethaly shot Ghost. It could've been along his collarbone or shoulder, not his head. And a lot of people think he was shot again, but I read on Call of Duty wikia that IW may have just added extra blood to Ghost's uniform for dramatic effect. And for the whole flame-retardent thing...they were most likely wearing something like that. I know IW will most likey NOT bring Roach back, but Ghost still has a chance. The only main character that IW brought back that everyone thought was dead was Captain Price (I would've preffered Gaz, but oh well, thats why we had Ghost ;D). I THINK they may bring Ghost back in MW3 in some sort of weird plot twist like with what they did with Price in MW2. I'd love it if they brought Roach back, not as a playable character, but as a supporting character like Ghost was. That way we could see what he looked like and what kind of personality he has. And we could delve deeper into the relationships he had with Mactavish and Ghost. I think Makerov is still alive, so MW3 will most likely deal with him. Remember, we still have Ramirez, Dunn, and Foley alive, so they'll probably be back as well. I'm still wondering what happened to Kamerov after MW1...maybe he showed up and saved Ghost and Roach? LOL, long shot, but we can always hope! I hope they bring him back as well!**

**Haha, that was a long reply, but it wasn't only an answer for Jacob, but I was also sharing my opinion on MW2 with everyone. If you wanna discuss what happened with Roach and Ghost, PM me and we'll talk, okay?**

**BTW, my 4th of July was awesome! We went out of state and bought some big ones and set them off, then Travis got out his Rifle and started acting stupid, then those idiot friends of mine were throwing M80's at each other! And cherry bombs...and other fireworks...plus, I got drunk. :D Smirnoff, Tequila, Lord Calvert, and Martini's. Haha, I am a bad influence... D:**

* * *

**Roach's Mental Notes**

**_August 8th, 2016_**

**11:00**

It's dark in here. I don't think I like the dark too much...And its really cold...I can hear someone talking into my reciever, but its all muffled, so I'm not sure what they're saying. All I know is that its dark, cold, and really cramped in here. I'm also clausterphobic. So I'm about _this much_ from seriously going bat-fuck insane.

Hmm...wait a second...my vision is becoming less obscured...Oh, I see...

LOL. I'm in a submarine...hanging onto an, err...miniature submarine...Haha, how stupid am I?

...I am half the man I used to be. And I do all the work.

**11:05**

Ah, finally...we're being released from this tiny capsule, so fuuuuck yeah. Haha, I don't know why, but I feel rather giddy today. Like I'm riding some sort of weird high. Must be my imagination?

**11:07**

We're going through this freezing-ass water now and I saw something that looked like some weird black circle of death in front of me. But this is the artic ocean, so I don't see how that's possible...It's only now that I know that its a submarine called USS Dallas or something...

I wonder why they name submarines after cities? Like Chicago and Dallas...It's sorta like how they named ships at Pearl Harbor after the states...I wonder if its the same guys running the show. You'd think that the others would get pissed because its patented or something and they wouldn't be allowed to do this, but...

Goddamnit. I'm doing it again. Mindless thinking.

**11:10**

We're coming up on that oilrig now. The guy in front of me is pointing for us to swim up. Sure. Okay. Up.

We're at the surface now and there's two tangos standing near the edge convienently...I wonder how these poor guys end up in situations like this. They should make these places a bit more fool-proof.

"On your go." Captain Mactavish whispers into the reciever. I hadn't realized that I'd subconciously brought out my knife.

Me and the Captain both sneek up on the two unsuspecting tangos and pull them into the waters at the same time. Ah, there's nothing like driving your survival knife 6 inches deep into the chest cavity of your enemy. Sweet, sweet stress-relief.

**11:15**

Hmmm...tangos really need to start paying attention to their whereabouts. There's another one, leaning stupidly over the railing, staring into god knows what...maybe he likes the fishies? God, I love the fishies-

ROACH! ROACH! Jesus Christ! I need to get ahold of my train of thought! I'm really starting to space out these days...

"Silenced weapons only." Mactavish ordered. I hadn't even realized until now that I'd been given orders to take him out.

**11:18**

I really do like these thermal weapons...they make me feel like...I'm a ninja or something...imagine it.

Pop a smoke grenade, throw it toward the enemy, disappear into the smoke, swing your nunchuks to make yourself look cool, then bring out your silenced thermal rifle and pop them right between the eyes while they turn left and right trying to spot you.

Seriously...It's awesome.

God...how old am I? I'm acting like...a 10-year old or something...I really need to get my shit together.

"Breaching, breaching!" Ghost called out. I almost yelp like a kicked puppy whenever I see a tango coming at me, AK-47 raised avove his head and ready to bash my skull in. Captain Mactavish tackles him quickly to the ground (or gives him a scottish hug...it's hard to tell) and quickly finishes him off before he can reach me.

"Roach!" He yells at me, making me jump. "Where's your head?"

I stutter nervously and point dumbly above my neck. "Here, sir...?"

He stares at me, like I've completely lost it, but then quickly recovers and shakes his head. I can hear him mutturing something, but with his scottish accent, its hard to tell what he's saying.

I guess I'm starting to loose my wits...

**11:25**

"Heli's coming, stick to the shadows!"

Everyone dives behind cover and I stumble over to behind a crate, hoping I won't be spotted. Luckily the helicopter flies away quickly and everyone sighs in relief. I'm so glad I didn't fuck that up. My retarded legs didn't need to get in the way today.

We have yet another room to breach, with more hostages behind the doors. I swear, if it were me, I'd just blow this shit up. Who cares. "OOPS! Uh-oh...accidently killed uhhhhh...about 10 workers who don't even have name-tags and personalities. My bad." I mean, its not like anyone would miss them...C'mon, they're oilrig workers. They already neglect their families and are almost always away on duty. It's not like anyone would miss them.

Wow...contradiction...that kinda sounds like the 141. I mean, lower ranking services...when there's nothing really huge going on, they get time to go back home and spend time with their families. Ever since I joined the 141, I haven't had time off. I kinda forget what home feels like...Wow, I think I miss my mommy...

I'm glad I don't have a wife or anything...or kids, THANK GOD. Y'know, this makes me wonder if the Captain or Ghost has a waifu...You think? Hmmm...nah...probably not. Mactavish seems too bad-ass for a family and Ghost is just...well...this sounds weird, but it's hard for me to imagine him doing anything other then following the Captain around...

**11:47**

Enemy helo is back and of course, _I_ have to save the day. 'Cause know one else can seem to shoot an RPG or Stinger or Javelin...

Luckily, I see some stingers lying on a crate and bolt for one. But then, like 15 freaking tangos spawn out of nowhere (_literally_) and start shooting at me. I attempt to throw a flashbang to distract them, but damnit, it accidently bounces off the crate beside me and rolls to my feet. Aw, shit.

It goes off in a deafening bang, bright light blinding me temporarily. I sit there, rolling around on the ground, rubbing my eyes and cussing like a sailor while the tangos just lower their guns and laugh at me. Goddamn flashbangs all the hell.

I hear gunshots behind me and realize that its the Captain defending me. God, I really do like him. A lot. Is that weird?

"Roach, get up!" He yanks me up by the arm, like a parent would do a red-headed step-child. "Take out that enemy helo!"

I mutter a few more string of curses, but still pick the stinger up and head for the outside. It isn't long before I lock onto the heli and send it spiraling into the ocean.

**12:03**

We have one more building to breach.

I should've known that this was going to a bitch. The enemy is popping smoke to no end and now I can't even see what's 3 feet in front of me. I reach out, stumbling much more clumsily then usual and grab onto something. I grip it to keep myself from falling head-over-heels.

"Roach? What the hell are you doing?" It's Ghost's voice. I hadn't realized that I was hugging his arm like a shy child.

"Ahh, shit! Sorry! I can't see anything!" I yell out. I'm glad he can't see my face too well. I'm pretty sure I'm blushing. Wait...WHAT?

"Switch to thermal!" He instructs me. I do as I'm told and use the scope to move forward to the breaching point. When I finally reach the door, I realize that Ghost was right beside me. Wow. Stealthy. I didn't even hear him.

"Breaching!" He called out, planting a charge on the door.

When the door explodes, I see a tango rushing forward, knife in hand. I quickly retaliate, grabbing his arm and twisting it behind his back while Ghost shoots him. "BITCH!" I yell out, like some pseudo-gangster. I notice that the remaining tangos and even blind-folded hostages turn to stare at me. I look at each and everyone of them, offended. "What the fuck are you looking at?"

Captain Mactavish and the others breach from the other side and shoot the rest of the unsuspecting tangos. Well...at least I was helpful in _some_ way. After checking all the hostages and C4 planted in the room, we all head for the LZ. "Nice job on saving those hostages Hotel Six." Mmmmm, praise felt so good.

**12:10**

We board the helicopters and Mactavish takes a seat next to me. "Moving on to phase two of the mission."

I'm suddenly handed a high-powered Sniper Rifle. Wait...we're _still_ not finished? C'MON! I swear, General Shepherd treats us like we're freaking robots or something! I really _do not_ like that guy whatsoever. I get some really bads vibes from him.

Oh well. YAY! I get to sit next to Captain Mactavish!

...Wait...why does that make me so happy?

* * *

**LMFAO! If you were observant, you might have noticed the implied pairings in this chapter. But if I must say it out loud, it was RoachxSoap and RoachxGhost. The whole hugging onto Ghost and having almost school-boy like thoughts about Mactavish was much too cute to pass up. I really do love Roach. He makes me happy! Expect much more RoachxSoap hints and a little of RoachxGhost (because I like RoachxSoap more for some reason).**

**Please R&R (Read and Review, not Rest and Recuperation, lmfao, though we all know Roach needs it.)**


	4. He Loves To Sing

**Hey there err'one! Yeah, so...as you know, we have this chapter and 2 more to go. This one is "The Gulag" one, then we have "Contingency" and then of course...my least favorite "Loose Ends".**

**I just have to get something out...Hanz Zimmer is a fucking musical genious. The music he composed for MW2 is **_**amazing**_**, especially the music that plays whenever Roach and Ghost get killed. I was listening to that music on YouTube last night and began crying my fucking eyes out. It wasn't even the scene I was watching it was **_**just the music**_**. Then my dad walks in on me and he's like, "Destiney...are you OKAY, sweetheart?" And I'm like, "Y-Yeah dad, just give me some time...I'm having a moment here." Lmfao, it was kinda awkward...**

**Also, if watched the vid that **_**supposedly **_**showed you what Roach's face looked like. But IW was so lazy, they didn't give him a head model, so he HAD NO HEAD! And he had 4 ARMS! The vid was shot in a no-clip mode (cheat used to zoom out and see things from 3rd person). I laughed my ass off. And a glitch occured (probably because of the cheats) and instead of the fire being on Ghost and Roach, it was behind Shepherd in the trees. then he just walks off into the fire, lol. It was like, "Okay. I'm done. Time to walk into hell." LMFAO! Here's the link: (dot)com/watch?v=TvVFOpAccc8**

**LOL, that was a looooong author's note...**

* * *

**Roach's Mental Notes**

* * *

_**August 8th, 2016**_

**14: 17**

We're coming up on the Gulag now.

"Thirty seconds." Captain Mactavish says. It's strange. He sounds like he's talking into the reciever, even though I'm sitting right next to him. Well, technically he _is _talking into his reciever, but...aw, forget about it.

Missiles are being launched into the cliffs near the Gulag...hey...the Navy wasn't with us before. How did they get here? Wow...I'm really unobservent these days. Sometiems I wonder if I have ADHD. Maybe I should get diagnosed?

**14:24**

"All sniper teams are free to engage targets."

FUCK YEAH! It's my favorite part. I _love _sniping. It's like...like...hell, I don't know what its like. but I like it. Whatever its like is awesome, because there's nothing like sniping when you feel like punching the wall. And wow, I'm, like, using the word _like _a lot. I sound like a prep.

I see a tango trying to tear the sheet off a SAM site and pop him right in the head. It blows clean off his shoulders. Kewl.

**14:28**

"Shift right." Mactavish orders the pilot. Just as we go to finish off another tower, a bomber flies by and blows the thing up wholesale. The helicopter begins to loose altitutde for a few seconds, but the pilot regains control.

"Shepherd, get those fighters to cease fire immeditaly, that was TOO close!" Mactavish yells into is reciever, causing my ears to ring. Wow. People just don't know how to talk normally anymore.

"I'll see what I can do. One man in a gulag doesn't matter that much to the Navy at this point." It was Shepherd's voice. Hmm...is it wrong of me not to like him for some reason? I mean...seriously...sometimes his atitude really gets on my nerves. The guy NEVER smiles. It really bothers me.

Mactavish smiles, every once in a while. Sometimes I can even see Ghost smile through his mask.

...I like it when the Captain smiles. It gives me one of those really awesome warm, fuzzy feelings, like nothing in the world can hurt you...

My god, I think I'm having an epiphany.

**14:29**

Ye-...Wait...Nope. No, I'm not having one. Damnit.

**14:40**

We're on the ground now, outside of the Gulag. And of course, engaged in some incredibly dangerous battle. Why can't Russians just chill out? Seriously. If we could just talk this through, we wouldn't have to do this. Why do people gotta be such assholes?

I don't know any of these guys. Never met them, never heard of them. But as soon as they see me, they scream something in Russianese and then try to shoot my ass off. It's really rude, actually. What happened to just being able to 'talk things over'?

**14:45**

I'm a little bored now. We completely have the fight in the bag, considering that we have the Navy on our side. So I think I'll sing.

"I was seeeeeearching. You were on a miiiiision. Then our hearts combined like a neautron star collision. I have nothing less to lose. you took your time to choooose. Then we told each other with no trace of feeeear...OUR LOVE IS FOREVER! And if we die, we die TOGHETHER!-"

It's now that I noticed that the Captain has stopped shooting completely and is looking at me, with an eyebrow raised.

I look down hurriedly, slightly embarrassed. "Sorry." I mutter apologetically.

"MUSE, huh?" He asks, completely ignoring my apology.

Wow, he knows the band I'm talking about...well...it is a British band, so I guess that's not so surprising. They are reeeally awesome. Hell, who doesn't like MUSE?

"You heard of them?" I ask eagerly. It was nice to know that we had something in common. Kinda made me feel giddy.

He raises his ACR and shoots a nearby tango. Then he smiles. "I like them."

I made him smile. Holy crap. I'm amazing.

**15:08**

We're inside the Gulag now and Ghost is hacking the computers opening gates for us. The Captain tells us to head down to the armory in the center. i drop down, then my mouth drops like a kid in a candy store.

SMGs, shotguns, magnums, akimbo, _holy shiiiiit_...

I've always loved guns. I've always had an interest in them. And to have so many choices laid out in front of me is like...Kiddie-Land.

"See anything you like?" Mactavish pokes fun at me. I resist yelling out a deafening YES.

**15:12**

Ghost tried opening the next gate, but it jams about halfway through.

"Ghost, open the gate." Captain Mactavish orders impatiently.

Ghost mutters something about the gate being locked or something. Suddenly I hear a gunfire and about 3 bullets whiz _right by_ my head. I stand there, like a deer in the headlights, trying to calm my racing heart. Holy shit...Jesus must reeeally love me today.

I love you, too, Jesus.

I duck down in the corner with Mactavish, covering my head with my hands. I guess it'd be better to have my hands blown off rather then my skull. God that would be terrible...I wouldn't be able to play Modern Warfare 2 anymore.

...What the hell is Modern Warfare 2?

**15:21**

Luckily, we found some riot sheilds, so we remained unharmed. Ghost finally has the door open now and we're rushing forward. I bash some of the tangos out of my way. Hmm, interesting how a riot sheild can kill in _just one hit_. I thought knight-sticks and riot sheilds were designed to subdue, but not kill...whoever thought of this obviously wasn't paying much attention.

I feel like singing again...so I think I'll sing another song.

I walk forward, bashing another tango. "I'M ON A BOAT!" I yell at them. They back away, staring at me like I'm some sort of psychopath. "I'M ON A BOAT!" I yell again. I ditch my riot sheild and bring out my ACR again. "Everybody look at me CUZ I'M SAILIN' ON A BOAT!" I shoot a tango in the leg and he goes down. He begins crawling away, terrified. "Take a real hard look AT THE MUTHFUCKIN' BOAT!" I stab him with my knife and continue singing the rest of the song. But I soon stop after I realize some of the looks Worm was shooting me. "What?" I ask, annoyed. "A guy can't sing around here?"

"Sure he can." Worm retorts back quickly. "If he's any good at it."

"Shut the fuck up."

**15:35**

We're in the shower room now. Wow, this is a _shower room_? It's FILTHY. I think I'd feel cleaner if I took a bath in a puddle of mud.

Karma. Fucking KARMA! Now we're being ambushed my tangos with riot shields of their OWN! Goddamn this shit to hell!

...Wow...what a zany outburst. Maybe I should have toned that down just a tad...

Luckily, I have a the M203 with me, so doom on the tangos, hahahHA. I quickly dispatch them, sending them flying into different directions. We progress through the showers and then the Captain yells at us to run for the hole in the middle of the next room.

I quickly dive down into it and almost break my legs on the steel platform below. Thanks for the heads up, _everyone_.

**15:41**

We're all running down the sewers now. And shit, does it smell _like shit_. I wanna get outta here.

"Ghost, talk to me. I don't wanna be down here whenever they start bombing again." Mactavish beckons him.

"Just keep going. I'm picking up two heat signatures behind the wall up ahead. One of them should be prisoner number 627." He replies, rushed.

Oh, thank GOD. I plant a charge on the wall just at the Captain tells me and it quickly explodes. When the smokes clears, I see what looks like a hobo holding a tango hostage. I don't know if I should shoot or not...I don't wanna restart from the last checkpoint...

Wait, what the hell?

Before I can react, I feel a fist connect with my temple and I'm knocked to the ground. Thanks for protecting me guys, seriously. When I turn my head back to the hobo, he has my own gun pointed at me. Then Mactavish draws his pistol and points it towards the hobo. Bless the Captains heart, Jesus, I love him.

Wait, what the hell?

"Drop it." He orders the hobo sternly. I sitting there, thinking "Fuuuuuck yesss."

But then the hobo turns around and whispers. "Soap?"

Soap? Why the fuck is he saying Soap for? Sure, he could definitely use some right now, but seriously, that was random.

"Price?" Capatain Mactavish whispers back, recognition gracing his face. He reverses the gun, handing it to the hobo. "This belongs to you, sir."

WHAT? They know each other...wait a second, my mind is getting all jumbled here. This is weird.

I deafening BOOM shakes the Gulag as we all realize that the Navy has gone back to bombing. The Price guy jerks me back up and we all start running.

**15:44**

The whole place is shaking, falling apart. We see the helicopter at the end of the tunnel and the Captain tells us to get ready to jump for it. Damn..._jumping_...my ONLY WEAKNESS!

Its then that I realize Worm is saying something, or rather singing something excitedly. "I can guide a missle with a satelite! With a satelite! With a satelite! I can guide a missle with-"

"WORM, WHAT THE FUCK, MAN!" I yell, smacking him upside the head.

"OW! What?" He yells back.

"You're SINGING at a time like this?" I retort.

He glares at me. "Well, excuse me, Mr. Contridiction. If remember correctly, you were singing earlier!"

I scoff, rolling my eyes, but then yell. "YEAH! But not whenever the Navy was trying to bury us alive!"

Just as we start to get closer to the end of the tunnel, the roof collapses in and blocks our way out. _Jesus H. Christ._...Mactavish yells at us to turn around and run the other way. We keep running and soon come to a dead end. We all stare up at the hole in the ceiling, panicking.

"Oh, what the _fuck_ are we gonna do now? Fuck!" I yell, exasperated. The hobo- I mean, _Price_, shoots me a wary look. The rook rumbled again, and debris start falling all around us. I huge chunk of rocks begins falling around me and one of them catches me in my already aching head. I black out, immediately, hearing Mactavish's voice calling my name.

"Soap, if you're gonna do something, do it now!" Price yells towards the Captain. Soap...? The Capatain was being called Soap...the kind that you wash yourself with. I wanted to laugh, but considering who it was and the situation we were in, I resisted. Price uncovered the rock over my head and I saw the Captain shoot a flare out of the ceiling.

"We see your flare, Hotel Six. SPIE rig on the way."

Holy shit, are we going to _make it_?

Price pulls me to my feet and a rope drops down the open ceiling. We all hook onto the rope and one by one, we're pulled off our feet. The last thing I remember was the flames shooting upward and Worm yelling maniacally at it like Satan was chasing him or something.

...Dumbass.

* * *

**Well now...this Chapter had a lot of songs in it! But that was the point of it. I guess you could say that was the theme of this chapter. If you want to know the songs, here they are.**

**The 1st one was **_**Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever) **_**by **_**MUSE**_

**The 2nd one was **_**I'm On A Boat Ft. T-Pain **_**by **_**The Lonely Island**_

**The 3rd one was **_**Handlebars **_**by **_**Flobots**_

**Please Review! KThxBai! ;D**


	5. He Is The Favorite

_Edit:_ I got a review pointing out a mindless mistake on my part. It's not really important, but if its not official, than it nags constantly at me. So, I went and fixed my little error. I'm gonna have to start doing thorough research if I want my chapters right.

**Hmmm...I seemed to have finally tore myself away from Photoshop/Youtube/Criken's Livestream...And now its time to see what my little Roachy is thinking of! Sorry for the delay, I've been rather busy...RAMIREZ! spamming, that is.**

**Me and like 5 other people on Criken's Livestream chat were spamming RAMIREZ! jokes and then like 2 other guys are all, "MW2 is gae" and "MW2 sucks, BBC2 could kick its ass anytime" I responded by spamming "RAMIREZ! Ignore the trollers!" Then we proceeded to LMAO. BTW, Oceanss says, "RAMIREZ! Revive Criken on Left 4 Dead 2 with no defibrillator or rescue closet! Oh, and DEFEAT CAPTAIN MACMILLAN WITH A PLASTIC SPOON!" xD**

**Oh yeah...songs I listened to while typing: **_Grounds for Divorce _by Elbow, _Like A Boss _by The Lonely Island, _Fuel _by Metallica, _Let's Play Some Tetris Motherfucker _by DJ Rush (LOL at the last one)

* * *

**Roach's Mental Notes**

* * *

_**August 10th, 2016**_

**13:17**

I buried in like...5 feet of snow, plus I'm tangled up in my parachute now...great. I hear Captain Mactavish, or _Soap_, as Price calls him talking into my headset.

"Roach? Roach, are you there? Roach!" He yells frantically. I narrow my eyes, trying to ignore the ringing in my ears. People really should learn- ...

Y'know what? I'm not even gonna say it anymore.

"I'm...fine..." I mumble out, but my voice is muffled by the snow and he doesn't hear me. I start digging my way up from the pile of ice that I landed in. Oh well. At least I didn't hit any big-ass trees like I usually do. I finally reach the surface, crawling out of the heap like some cliche zombie. Captain Price is jogging his way over to me.

"Price have you located Roach yet? I'm not picking him up on my satelite feed..." It's Mactavish again.

"I've found him." Price replies. He crouches down next to me and we pull out our silenced rifles.

**13:22**

We're procceeding on by foot now and already we've spotted 4 tangos.

"-frag grenades, one german shepherd." I suddenly pick up from Price.

"Dogs? I hate dogs." Captain Mactavish jokes lightly. I smile real big like an idiot for some reason. I'm glad my face-mask obscures it from Price's vision. It'd be awkward if all of a sudden he turned around and saw some creepy-ass grin on my face.

We move up closer, but an incoming truck makes us stop short. We jumped behind some bushes and trees and lie low until it moves by.

Hmmm...why did I have to go with Captain Price? Seriously...why couldn't it have been Captain Mactavish. What? I'm not being biased or anything...I'm just used to working with the latter...I wouldn't have minded working with Ghost either, since he's actually with us. This Price guy...John Price? Amiright? He's okay, but Mactavish makes me feel..._safe_. This guy makes me feel like I'm gonna get hit by a nuke at any second...

"We'll take them out at the same time. You take the dog and his handler on the left." I raise my rifle until I'm looking out of the finely tuned scope and snipe the tango next to the dog, then the dog itself. "Beautiful." He compliments me.

Beautiful? Killing two people without them noticing is _beautiful_? Well...our definitions of beautiful seem to differ greatly. That was _ghastly_.

How did Captain Mactavish stand working with this guy, seriously...his presence itself it _depressing_. It makes me wanna go emo. Y'know what? this reminds me of another song by Hollywood Undead- NO! Roach, you are NOT gonna let yourself start singing again. Last time you did that, you almost got shot with a Desert Eagle and buried in some godforsaken Gulag. Singing, officially, is bad luck.

**13:30**

"Incoming!" Price yells out to me. I turn and see a BTR heading straight for me. Price yanks me by my jacket towards the direction of the forest. We run, with the BTR firing right at our heels. A tree limb falls and nearly knocks my head of my shoulders. I cover my head with my hands and try my best not scream.

"Slow down. They can't track us this far." Price calls out to me. We slow to a walk and route our way through the trees. We come up on two tangos, obviously searching for us. "Get down." I go to hide behind a tree, but Price _pushes_ me away from the spot and claims it as his own.

'Dude...WTF. That was my hiding place, noob.' I think angrily. I hide behind a smaller, less concealing bush beside him. The search team passes us and we continue to move through the thick woods. We come up on another search team, twice as big as the last.

"Take them out...or leave them be. Your call." He says in a low voice. I go to raise my silenced rifle and aim at the first two I see, but then I see the two german shepherds they have sniffing ahead. I suddenly have a flashback to the Favela whenever I was attacked by a dog and decide that now's not a good time to get my throat torn out. I lower my gun and wait patiently for the rest to pass.

**13:45**

"Roach, use the Predator Drone to take out that enemy vehicle." Price orders me. "This hill is perfect for the job."

I pull out the laptop and aim the predator missle for the machinary towards the end of the hill. Right after I launched the missle, the screen of the laptop turns into static and goes offline. "Dude...some virus..." I mumble under my breath.

"Soap, they've got mobile SAM sites, our Predator Drone is down! Roach, follow me, let's go!" We slide down a steep, icy hill. I feel my legs fold weirdly at the end and realize that I've gave myself a crink. I wiggle my leg in an attempt to work the crink out. Captain Price turns and stares at me. "Roach...what are you doing?"

"Agh, nothing! It's nothing." I continue following him, despite the weird crink in my leg. We duck behind some crates, taking fire from the now alerted tangos. I see a M16A4 lying on top of the crate and quickly snatch it, disposing of my silenced pistol. I scowl, realizing what a cliche gun this is. I miss my ACR...

We ditch the cover of the crates and move to hide behind an enemy jeep. I see movement at the corner of my eyes and automatically fire.

"Don't fire! Friendlies coming out!" It was Ghost, who had just barely dodged my bullet.

"Aw, shit Ghost! You could've said something earlier!" I exclaim.

"You could have been more patient." He retaliates. I realize that its best for me just to shut up and keep moving. I've never gotten on Ghost's bad side...I like being the favorite and I don't want that to change.

Wait...what? I'm not the favorite...since when did I make that conclusion?

**(Flashback to 5 days ago...)**

"Hey Roach!" Meat yells at me, like I'm deaf or something. "Me and Worm and the others are hungry...why don't you sneak into the mess hall and get us something?"

"Hell-fucking-no." I reply immediatly, not looking away from the book I was reading.

"Aw, c'mon man...we're hungry...if any of us tried, we'd get caught and get our asses beaten by Ghost and the Captain. You're a sneaky bastard." I ignored Meat's pleas, merely focusing on the words in front of me. "C'mooooooooon, Rooooooach." He drags on like an impatient child. I sigh heavily and toss my book down.

"I'm not doing it, Meat. I'll probably get caught too. And I don't feel like getting yelled at by Ghost or the Captain."

Meat scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Everyone knows that Ghost and the Captain _love_ you. You're like...their favorite. As for everyone else, they coudln't give a fuck."

"That's a lie." I retaliate. "Mactavish favorites Ghost and Ghost favorites Mactavish."

"And in turn, they both favorite you. So...that's that. Now go get us something to eat before I turn into a cannibal." Meat gives me a starting shove towards the exit and I groan.

"Fine, cry-baby. If it'll shut you up." I hurry quickly into the mess hall. The don't risk turning on the lights and instead use my lighter. I quickly head for the cabinets, snooping quickly for something that would shut Meat up. Just as I go to reach for a bag of chip, the lights flick on and I nearly trip over myself trying to disengage my hand from the cabinet.

"Roach?" I realize that its Ghost, missing his balaclava and sunglasses. He stares at me for a bit, studying my deer-in-the-headlights expression. "What are you doing up this late? Stealing food from the mess hall?"

"Ghost, I can explain, really." I gush out. "Everyone kept complaining and Meat wouldn't shut up and they-"

"What's all the chatter about?" I hear the scottish accent and resist face-palming. Now the Captain was here as well. I'm so in for it..."Roach? What on earth are you doing?" He takes notice of the bag of chips that has now fallen from the cabinet. He pieces the scene together then shakes his head. "This is a sight..." He grins at me and laughs.

"W-wha-what's so funny Captain?" I laugh nervously along.

He walks over to the cabinet, Ghost watching. He grabs the bag of chips that's fallen on the floor and hands them to me. "If you're hungry, mate, you don't have to sneak around. Here." I take the chips from him, a complete loss of words.

Ghost chuckles slightly at me, observing my shocked face. "Alright, Roach. We'll let you go. Go on."

I smile nervously, then quickly nod and exit the mess hall. I hadn't even realized that I'd been half-running. When I reach Meat and the other's quaters I quickly throw the bag of chips at him and sink down onto my bed.

"What's wrong Roach? You look like you've just seen a ghost..." Worm asks, munching on the chips.

"You can say that..." I mumble numbly. I see shoot each other a strange glance and quickly add. "Don't ask."

**(Present Day)**

I shake my head, realizing that I was right about being their favorite...wow...

I'd totally forgotten that we'd been in a fierce gunfight and narrowly missed being shot if it wasn't for Archer. He claps my shoulder, merely nodding at me and rushes ahead with the others. I quickly follow him, curisng my unawareness.

**13:57**

We're close to the docks now where the submarine is waiting to leave. Mactavish alerted us that the Predator Drone was back online. Woah...fixed that fast? He's gotta let me in on whatever virus protection he's using...

I bring out the Predator Drone and aim for the heli attempting to take off. I smile as the missle hits its mark. But the explosion puts the whole base on alert. I frown at the sound of the alarm going off. Oh, _shit_...usually the only time alarms go off is whenever...

Yup. There it is. The weird countdown that's randomly popped up in my HUD. Great. I rush quickly down the hill we were hiding on and into the russian base. I try bringing out the Predator Drone again, but Matavish stops me, saying. "Arming AGMs. Standby."

A...G...Ms? That sounds like a rip-off version of an _ATM_. Seriously...some of the military abbreviations are strange...especially the call-signs. Why do they remind me of pointless things?

I continue to rush ahead, only to be held back by a convoy and stragglers taking cover near a warehouse. "AGMs are online." Mavtavish informs me. I bring out the Predator Drone and blow the convoy plus the stragglers into hell. "Nicely done, Roach. Ten plus kills." That's right...I'm Roach, bitch.

**13:59**

We've finally made it to the docks and that annoying countdown has gone away. Strangely...so has the alarm.

"Cover me from that building while I head for the sub!" Price unders us. Me, Ghost, Archer, and the others climb to the roof of the building and snipe the remaining tangos. Two trucks come to a stop, but hardly anyone has a chance to get out before getting blown away by a predator missle.

"Good job, Roach. Trucks destroyed." Mactavish compliments. Ahhh, praise...there's nothing like it.

"Price, come in!" Ghost yells frantically into his radio. "The silo doors are opening! I repeat, the silo doors are opening! Price! Do you copy? The silo doors are opening, Price!" Wow, I've never heard Ghost sound to frantic before...It's got me panicking a little.

"Good." Comes to monotone reply. What? GOOD?

"Oh, what the FUCK man!" I yell out, unable to retain my own shock.

"Price, NO!" Ghost yells out. We all watch as a nucleur missle is launched from the sub. "We have a missle launch! Missle in the air! Code Black! Missile in the air!" Ghost rings out again and again. We all stare dumbfounded while the missle disappears into the sky.

...FUCK.

* * *

**Well, there you go. Contingency. Now, the next chapter...Loose Ends. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Asdfasdf, I'm going to hate writing that chapter! I'm going to CRY! I would rather chops my fingers off! ...Nah, but still, I'm going to hate writing it. It's going to be hard having any humor at ALL in the chapter, consdiering what's gonna happen. But I'm going to try and keep the "Roachy-ness" in it like I've done with all the other chapters.**

**So...please Review! I'm going to need all the support I can get for the next chapter! (And...this will be the first story I've finished in AGES)**


	6. He Is A Cockroach

**Well...we made it...Loose Ends. Jesus Christ, this is like Satan in mission form. I HATE this mission with the burning intensity of a thousand deserts. And I HATE Shepherd. But that's why we have the Museum level. We can shoot that fucker with EVERY. GUN. IN. THE. GAME. **

**Like I said before, it's gonna be hard to put some if not any humor in this chapter. It may be a little more serious then the rest. Fuck it, its gonna be **_**a lot more **_**serious then the rest. It's also gonna be interesting to write from Roach's POV during the betrayal. But still...I ish a sad fangirl right now. D:**

* * *

**Roach's Mental Notes**

* * *

_**August 11th, 2016**_

**14:44**

We're somewhere in the Caucasus Mountains. Well, I guess this is it then...we capture the funny russian man and end everything. It's kind've weird...not the situation in itself, but the feeling I'm getting right now. We're so close to the end, but is that really a _good thing_?

"Snipers in position." Archer's voice rings out in my headset.

"Strike Team go. Engage Makarov on sight." Ghost orders, standing up from his crouched position beside me.

"Roger that, Solid copy" Scarecrow and Ozone reply at the same time.

We work out way down the hill, walking cautiously through the thick brush of the woods. All of a sudden, I see something shoot up from the ground and the world slows down for a small bit.

"Ambush!" Ghost yells out to the rest of the team. I hit the ground, my face smashes into the dirt. _Yuck..._ The landmines explode just above my head and deafens me literally. I crawl back up the hill, trying to advoid the gunfire being directed at me. "Targets! Left side! Left side!" Ghost calls out again. I make it to a tree and take cover, noticing the RPGs on the cliff to our left and the smoke grenades being popped into the trees.

"They've got this area prestiged for mortar fire!" Scarecrow yells out to us.

"Counterattack into the smoke! Push, push!" Ghost yells back. I gather my wits and rush into the smoke, completely unaware of my surroundings. I could've sworn a couple of bullets whizzed just by my head.

Now I'm completely lost, and have no idea where I'm going. "Ghost!" I call out.

"Roach, keep moving! Keep moving!" He follows my voice and grabs me by my 141 jacket and pulls me through the smoke. We make it out into a fairly clear field in front of Makarov's safehouse.

**14:51**

"We've got two trucks leaving the target building." Archer informs us.

"Don't let those trucks get away!" Ghost retorts quickly.

"Roger! Firing Javelin, danger close!" Archer alerts the group.

"Javelin, danger close! Get back from the road!" We all back away quickly as the trucks go by. I try shooting one of them with my ACR, but the bullets bounce of like pellets. "Bloody hell, these trucks are bulletproof!"

"Shit!" I yell out. Before another word can be said, two Javelin missles strike the trucks and blow them to crispy frames.

"Moving vehicles have been neutralized. Be advised, we have not, I repeat, we have not spotted Makarov and no one else has left the house. Those trucks may have been decoys, over." Archer's voice chimes in.

"Goddamnit," I curse under my breath. Seriously, this is like finding waldo. This Makarov guy is like a fricking magician and can disappear in the blink of an eye.

**14:59**

We've breached the house now, and are searching for evidence against the Moscow airport massacre. But Makarov isn't here so...my enthusiasm is offically dead. I walk around like some monotone mute, following orders robotically. Jesus Christ, I CANNOT wait until this is over and I can go to bed. 'You're almost done Roach.' I remind myself. 'Just a little longer and we're outta here.'

Scarecrow is taking photos of random newspaper clippings. I follow around, reading various newspapers. Oh..._The Infinity Ward Times_...that sounds like a decent title.

Wait...what?

"Shepherd, this is Ghost. No sign of Makarov. Perhaps our intel was off." Ghost speaks into his headset.

"Plenty...at least fifty hired guns here. But no sign of Makarov. _Perhaps _our intel _was_ off." Captain Price adds as well.

"Copy that Ghost," It's Shepherd speaking now. "Have your team collect everything they can for an operations playbook. Names, contacts, places, everything."

Ghost replies quickly, enthusiasm in his voice. "We're already on it, sir. Makarov will have no place to run."

"That's the idea. I'm bringing up the extraction force. ETA five minutes. Get that intel. Shepherd out." My heart rises at the thought of extraction and finally putting an end to Makarov. I sigh contently, my enthusiam renewed.

"Roach, get on Makarovs computer and start the transfer to the DSM. Ozone, you're on rear security. I've got the front. Go." Ghost orders Ozone. He complies and quickly heads towards the back door. I head towards the computer and set the DSM up, starting the transfer.

"Task Force, this is Price. More of Makarov's men just showed up at the boneyard... Soap, cover me. I'm gonna slot that guy over there and use his radio to listen to their comms. Ghost, we're going silent for a few minutes. Good luck up there in Russia. Price out."

Oh god...I knew it. I knew this was gonna happen. Reinforcements...JESUS CHRIST, BUDDHA, ALAH, whatever god is out there...Give me a break!

I groan angrily and stalk down to the weapons cache in the basement, grabbing a thermal-scoped gun from the rack. At least they had half-way decent weapons, not like the thousands and thousands of AK-47's like I usually see. I plant the rest of my claymores around the estate, at the front, side, rear, and basement entries. These fuckers ain't gonna get _10 feet_ within me and the DSM.

**15:05**

Some heli's just dropped russian troops onto the premises. I take cover in the back room, waiting first the first explosion from my claymores to go off. I hear the first one go off to my right and see some tangos trying to enter through the side door. I quickly pick them off, using the thermal scope to my advantage. Nice. Ghost stands at the front door and I see a tango running at him with his AK held above his head. I quickly intercept, jabbing him in the stomach with my knife. Ghost turns towards me, completely unaware of what was about to happen. He notices the dead body.

"Watch your back, Ghost." I remind him.

He laughs a little, half-heartedly. "No longer the little FNG, are you?" He fires at a tango coming in from the main entrance.

"You can say that again. Pretty soon, I'm going to begin making you look bad if you keep this up." I joke sarcastically, downing a tango at the side entrance.

"Keep dreaming, you little bugger." He retorts, throwing a flashbang. "You're still just a kid to me."

"A kid that can kick ass." I remind him, meleeing a nearby tango.

"True that, mate." He finally agrees, patting me on my back.

**15:08**

"I'm hit!" I hear Ozone yell. I turn towards his direction, my heart skipping a beat.

"Ozone!, Ozone is down!" Me and Ghost yell at the same time.

"Roach, the transfers complete! I'll cover the main approach while you grab the DSM! Move!" Ghost yells to me. I hurry over to the table, trying to route through the tangos fire. Ghost covers me while I unhook the DSM from the computer.

"I got it!" I yell out. I stick the DSM inside my vest.

"This is Shepherd. We're almost at the LZ. What's your status, over?"

"We're on our way! Roach, let's go!" Ghost commands me and what's left of our team, which is just Scarecrow. I resent the thought of leaving Ozone behind, but grudgingly move away from the house. We run through the open field, bullets flying dangerously close behind us. I hear someone yell in pain and see Scarecrow go down.

"I'm hit!" He yells.

I run over to his position and try to help him up. "Scarecrow, c'mon! We're almost there, man!" I speak frantically.

"Go on, Roach...! F...Forget about me! You're going to get yourself killed...!" He replies weakly, holding his hands over his bleeding stomach. I hesitate, shaking my head no. He looks at me angrily and yells out with what strength he has left. "GO ROACH!" I hesitantly stand up and begin back away from Scarecrow. Ghost reaches for me and pulls me along.

"Come on, Roach. It's what he wants. Let's go." He murmurs quietly to me.

We resume running to the LZ. I'm forcing my legs to run, resenting myself and the fact that we left Ozone and Scarecrow behind like they were nothing. Me and Ghost take cover by a band of trees, taking fire from all sides and in danger of mortar explosions.

"They're bracketing our position with mortars, keep moving but watch your back! Roach, I got you covered! Go! Go! Get to the LZ! Keep moving! We gotta get to the LZ! Roach, come on!" Ghost yells frantically.

I push myself through the spray of bullets and mortar explosions towards the LZ with everything I have. Just as I near the landing zone, a mortar explosion goes off right next to me and I black out.

...

I can hear muffled voices...gunshots...and yelling. I feel someone pulling me by my arm through the grass, away from the mortars. "I've got you, Roach, hang on!" It's Ghost...still pulling me along... "Thunder Two-One, I've popped red smoke in the treeline! Standby to engage on my mark!"

I reach for a fallen AK-47 and began shooting at the leftover tangos, my breaths raspy and pained. I can feel the burning pain in my side from the explosion. I'm pretty sure there's some shrapnel there...

"Thunder Two-One, cleared hot!" Ghost yells into his reciever. He pulls me along the faded grass, desperately trying to reach the LZ. I continue spraying bullets at the remaining russians, taking out as many as I can. My vision fades and blurs momentarilly, but comes back to me at Ghost's voice. "Roach, hang in there!" He hoists me up by my arm and helps me limp towards the pavelow where General Shepherd is waiting. "C'mon, get up, get up! We're almost there!"

We reach General Shepherd and I steady myself by placing my other arm on his shoulder. "Do you have the DSM?" He asks us in the usual monotone.

"We've got it sir!" Ghost replies proudly.

"Good," Shepherd continues. "That's one less loose end."

Before anyone can react, before anyone could notice, Shepherd fires his .44 magnum into my abdomen. I fall back into the grass, hands over my wound, rasping for air. Then Ghost...-

Oh, god..._Ghost_...

"NO!" Ghost screams out, raising his ACR, but it was too late. Shepherd casually shoots him, not even aiming and I see the bullet make its mark on his chest. He falls back to the ground, motionless. _Lifeless_.

"Gh...ost.." I wretch out weakly, but the name is barely audible. General Shepherd reaches down into my vest and grabs the DSM that was tucked away there. 'You bastard...you betraying fucking bastard...' I think over and over again. He motions for two troops and they come towards me. My vision fades once again, obscuring my sight. It focuses back into reality and I realize that I'm being swung, like a doll. They toss me into a dirt pit and I roll like a rag-doll. I turn and see that now they have Ghost. 'You fucking bastards, don't touch him!' I wanted to yell out, but the pain overwhelmed my voice. They toss him in along with me and he rolls towards me. I can see the gunshot more clearly now. There's blood all over his vest and the spot on his balaclava where his mouth should be is also covered in blood. "Ghost..." I wretch out weakly again.

I turn to see General Shepherd smoking a cigar while the troops return with gasoline tanks. _They're going to burn us... _

In my headset, I can hear Captain Price yelling frantically. "Ghost! Come in, this is Price! We're under attack by Shepherd's men at the boneyard! Soap, hold the left flank! Do not trust Shepherd! I say again, do not trust Shepherd! Soap, get down!-" _It's too late_, I wanted to respond.

I feel and smell the gasoline being poured on me. It washes over my goggles and the strong scent of it causes me to gag. General Shepherd just looks at me, smoking a damned cigar.

Cigar...

He flicks the cigar at me and it lands in the puddle of gasoline, igniting me. But the pain is barely registered. My mind is stuck on the betrayal and Ozone and Scarecrow and Toad and Archer...and..._Ghost_. My whole body is just..._numb_, just like my mind. Shepherd looks on for just a bit more, then turns to walk away, twisting his hand in the air for some order. My vision slowly fades, everything turning dark and bleak.

Then there was nothing.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character...would you slow down or speed up?

You have a choice. Live or _die_. Every breath...is a choice. Every minute is a choice. To be or not to be.

When the game is over...the _King _and the _Pawn _go into the same box.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

"You're back..."

The sky was dark, the clouds dark gray against the black.

"I...am...?"

Laughing. He was laughing at me.

"Little bugger..." He said weakly. "I guess they're right about cockroaches...they can survive anything..."

* * *

**Da dada DAAAAA! Well now...there's a little cliffhanger ending for you folks...what do you think happened there, huh? I won't say anything to make it official, but what you think is your own conclusion...but...don't be surprised if I come back WITH A EPILOGUE/SEQUEL. It just depends on how much love I recieve from my readers...no, faving or alerting this story is nice, but REVIEWS are what urge me on...so...**

**Foley: RAMIREZ! Tell these readers to REVIEW RIGHT NOW! Oh, and TIE MY SHOES!**


	7. Epilogue

**So...after getting close to 20 reviews for the last chapter, I decided to continue on with an epilogue! **

**I beat MW2 on Veteran again yesterday...and Loose Ends hit me very hard, as usual. DAMN YOU SHEPHERD! And I just got done playing Left 4 Dead 2, lol. I learned that its better to carry around melee weapons rather then the Desert Eagle whenver playing on expert. Haha...and molotovs. **

**DIIIIE! BURN IN HELL! Awwww, god, he's not burning in hell, he's just burning! (Don't ask, xD)**

* * *

**Roach's Mental Notes**

* * *

_**August 18th, 2016**_

**9:03**

I look like a fucking mummy.

No...seriously...I'm bandaged from _head to toe_. My side is killing me, every inch of my skin _burns_, and it feels like Chuck Norris round-house kicked me in the stomach.

Overall, its not so bad.

Except for that annoying-ass beepig coming from the monitor besdie my bed. And the IV's in my arms. And the neck brace. And the 2 foot-thick cast on my leg.

Okay, its bad.

But that's not important now. I just wanna know where the hell I am. I don't think purgatory hurts as much as this.

**9:15**

I CANNOT move. I've already tried raising up, but its hard enough with all the bandages, cast, and gaping, endless pits of pain in my side and stomach. I finally give up, relaxing back into the hospital bed and groaning in frustration.

I notice that the television is on, turned down to a low volume. I listen closely to it and hear that the person speaking on the screen isn't english, but rather russian.

Russia. Great. Who the hell would bring me here?

"Has...changed...all?" I hear faintly from the other side of the door. The voice is muted slightly by the walls and I listen eagerly, trying to interpret what they're saying. I hear a woman reply quickly detecting a russian accent in her small voice. But its too low for me to understand what she's saying. "Can...in?"

I see the handle on my side of the door turn and quickly close my eyes again, pretending to be asleep. I feel the wind from the door against my face and several pairs of footsteps coming towards me.

"He looks bad." I hear the familiar english accent, buts its not Ghost. "I'm surprised he was still alive when we found him. Poor kid was charred..."

I finally recgnize the voice. _Archer_.

"He was lucky. The bullets in Shepherd's .44 didn't produce a mushrooming effect. If they did, it would've obliterated his stomach and he would've bled to death in mere minutes." I recgonized the other voice as Toad. So...they _had_ survived. But what about Ghost? Where was he? Was he okay?

I heard someone else laugh, voice deeper then the latter two. "I guess I finally understand where his call-sign comes from." I struggle to keep my eyes from opening wide at the new voice. I easily recognize Captain Price. "I thought his name was ridiculous, almost as ridiculous as Soap's. But it makes sense...cockroaches are bloody hard to kill."

Archer laughed along with him. But then soon cleared his throat. "By the way, how is Mactavish?"

Holy shit, the Captain...how could I forget about him? I listened more closely, hoping they could shed some clues on to what had happened after Makarov's safehouse.

"You can't bring him down for long." Price finally replid after a short pause. "He's tough, I'll give him that much. He's already wanting to sign himself out of the hospital. but the doctors are urging him to stay a bit longer. So naturally, he's in a bad mood."

Captain Mactavish was hurt...what the hell had happened?

"I still can't believe..." Toad trailed of slowly. I could tell that he was shaking his head.

"Shepherd fooled us all. But that bastard won't be fooling anyone else." Price spoke, voice full of triumph.

Wait a second...what? What happened to Shepherd? I finally decide to give up fake sleeping and pretend to yawn and stretch what uninjured limb I can. Archer, Toad. and Price all turn towards me.

"Roach? Are you okay?" I hear Archer ask. I open my eyes and gaze at the three of them. I can see that Toad's shoulder his bandaged. Archer looks fine, no noticeable injuries on him. But Price...Price's face was covered in light purple, healing bruises. I wonder what the hell happened to him.

"Whaddiya mean?" I ask sarcastically. "I'm fiiiiine." I see the three of them smile at me. Price gently claps my good shoulder.

"Good to have you back, son. Things were getting a little too serious without you." He lowered his eyes, shaking his head in deep thought. Then he made all three of us jump when he burst into a fit of laughter. I sunk back cautiously into the bed, sharing frightened looks with Toad and Archer. I didn't know if this was a good things or a bad thing. I mean...it was _Price_. "How the bloody hell did you survive?" He suddenly asked me. "You realize we went out of our way to hunt Shepherd down and exact revenge on you and Ghost, _whom we thought were dead_. You could have saved us a lot of work!"

"Wait, Shepherd's DEAD?" I asked incrediously.

"Dead as can be. Killed by Soap, actually...straight through the eye." I made a throwing motion with his hand. I stared at him confused. He noticed and continued on with the details. "_A knife _straight through the eye, is what I mean. Shepherd thought he could kill Soap as well. He managed to stab him..." Price shuddered at the memory. "He was going to finish it, or so he thought. Went to shoot Soap. But I managed to knock the gun away friom him. That's where things...got a bit physical."

"The bruises...?" I motioned towards his face.

"Yeah...I hate to admit it, but I was getting my arse kicked towards the end there. Soap, _somehow_, managed to pull that knife from his chest. And he just _threw it_." Price studied my face and knew what I was dying to ask. "I'll tell him you're awake."

They turned to exit the room, but I called out. "Wait! What about...what about Ghost? Is he...did he make it?"

I waited, my heart beatin furiously, awaiting the news of my commrade. They all exchanged looks with each other and I felt my heart began to sink. I lowered my eyes, a new pain coursing through my chest.

"Roach, what are you getting all down about?" Toad asked me. "Ghost is _fine_." I raised my eyes to them again, resisting to smile like an idiot. "He's awake, too. We'll tell him you're awake if you want."

"Yeah, do that for me." I was dying to talk to Ghost and the Captain. The thought of a reunion with the two sent my heart beating happily.

**9:45**

Damn...it had been over 30 minutes now...where the hell was everyone? You'd think I'd hear from them now...What where they doing, having tea and crumpets?

...No...I will not go there again...

I sighed, staring up at the off-white ceiling of the hospital. Then I heard the door swing open and scrarmbled to sit up-right in my bed.

"Cockroaches are bloody hard to kill." He spoke right away, echoing Price's exact words from before.

"That's why they call me that." I replied, unbashed. "How are you two feeling, huh?"

"Like hell...:" The Captain replied first. "Or more specifically, like I've been stabbed by a damn butcher knife. How about you, Roach? You look rough."

"I've had worse." I said, dismissivly. They both sent me critisizing looks. "What? Seriously, I'm fine."

"You're not _fine_." Ghost chatised me, voice deadly serious. "For god's sake, you were nearly _burned alive_ Gary." The use of my first name made my heart skip a beat. Ghost _rarely_ ever called me by my first name. It was definitely strange for me to hear it from him.

"He's right." Mactavish agreed solemnly. "Over 70 percent of your body was covered in 2nd and 3rd degree burns. You were shot point-blank with a magnum, and wounded by a mortar explosion. You're not fine." He took a seat beside my bed, sitting in the chair backwards with his head and hands resting on the back of the chair. "I still can't believe you're alive. As much blood you lost."

"Why are you two jumping on me, huh? Have you forgotten about yourselves? C'mon...I mean, Ghost, you were shot too! And Captain...I mean...it's really not fair!"I stared down at the bed sheets, fisting them in frustration.

Ghost glared at me, while the Captain merely had a hard stare. "Gary, do you honestly think we were _jumping _on you?" Ghost asked in disbelief. "Just because you couldn't stop Shepherd from betraying us doesn't mean we're mad at you."

"Well, then...why are you two angry with me?" I asked, confused.

"We're not angry with you." Mactavish interceeded, voice stiff. "I'm your Captain." He rested his forehead against on his hands. "And I couldn't even save you two when you needed me the most." He paused, taking in a deep breath and exhaling. "And I coudn't even save the 141."

If I was going to say anything before, I couldn't now. The words were trapped in my throat. We all sat in silence, staring at anything and everything but each other. The silence and tension was so thick, you could cut it with a knife

"Stop that baby talk, Soap."

We all turned out attention towards the door, where Price was leaning against the wall. "Price-"

"I don't want to hear it." He cut Mactavish off suddenly. "You can't do everything, you idiot. You're not superman. And above all, you shouldn't be blaming youself for something so stupid as this. They're alive, right?"

"Yeah-"

"Well, be grateful for that." Price's voice softened along with his ice-blue eyes. "You did everything and even more a man could do for his team. You shouldn't have a single regret in your heart. Soap...we've all been there. We've felt what you've felt." He inclined his head towards Ghost, making me turn my eyes towards him. I'd heard several things about Ghost's past from the Captain and knew that he _had_ experienced that feeling before. I noticed that Price was also reffering to himself. I'd also heard the story about the ultranationalists and Imran Zakhaev. He'd been there, too. "So don't sit there and feel bad for yourself. It's done and over with. It's part of the past. Man up."

I silently thanked Price for showing up. Everything he'd said was the truth. Now if the Captain could only realize that...

"Awww, jeez..." I finally rang out, clutching my stomach.

Everyone turned and stared at me. "Are you in pain, Roach?" Mactavish asked me.

"Nooooo..." I groaned. "I'm _so hungry!_"

They all stared at me in silence. I just sat there, awkwardly saring back. Then they all bust out into laughter. I blushed furiously and lowered my eyes, not wanting to look at the trio. "I guess that liquid diet isn't helping any?" Ghost asked me sarcastically.

"Hell no!" I found myself yelling out. "Y'know what sounds nice? ...Steeeeak...And honey-glazed ham...and...well, shit. There's a lot of stuff that sounds good right now."

They continued laughing. Captain Mactavish rested a hand on my shoulder. "We'll see what we can do, mate. Maybe they'll take thos IV's out."

"Well, they better." I mumbled, grimacing at the needles in my arms.

**14:27**

John Price and John Mactavish...Most Wanted...

Their names were even higher then Makarov's. I'd already learned why we were in a Russian hospital instead of one back in the states. Nowhere was safe. Everyone was looking for us. And no one could be trusted.

"You sure you want to stay, mate?" Mactavish had asked me after I'd thrown the newspaper down.

"Of course." I said matter-of-factly.

"You'll be labled a criminal along with us. You may still have a chance, Gary. You can still go back to the states."

I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "I'm staying riiiiight here."

"What about your friends and family? Are you willing to just let go of them, just like that?" He'd asked, voice critical.

"Didn't really have a lot of _good _friends back at home. And 'sides...after my mom died, I really didn't give a shit about my family. It was always pretty dysfunctional, even when she was alive. So I don't care." I spoke dismissivly of my friends and family, like they were something far-off and distant from my mind. Which was true. "Anyway, you guys should already know that _you are_ my friends and family." The Captain smiled at me, causing me to smile back. "Oh, and don't you even say that was corny."

"I won't." He replied simply.

Nikolai walked into the room and came to stand beside Mactavish. "I just came to tell you that since Roach is concious and in better condition now, we'll be able to leave in a week."

"They're releasing us?" Mactavish asked, turning to his russian friend.

"In a week, as I said."

He sighed, relieved. "About time...Where are you taking us, Nikolai?"

"I know a guy...and another place." He looked at me and must've noticed the look I was shooting back at him. "I know a lot of things." He said, shrugging.

"On the run..." I mumbled. It earned me the attention of the Captain again. "So...what're we gonna be doing from now on?"

"I suppose trying to clear our names. Makarov is still out there. He's bound to have the intel we need to prove our innocence. Are you up for the job, Roach?"

I rolled my eyes at the stupid question. "I'm not completely useless."

* * *

_The End_

* * *

**Well...now...there you go...the end of it. And I mean, THE END. **

**I had a lot of people asking me if I was gonna do a "Ramirez's Mental Notes". My answer is no. I actually have another Roach fanfic planned out in my head. But don't worry. For those of you who want a "Ramirez's Mental Notes", all hope is not lost. I gave someone permission to write that fanfic, so it might pop up later on down the road if that person decides to capitalize on the idea. It'll most likely be in the same format, just not by me.**

**But if any of you would like to make an "Allen's Mental Notes", you're free to the idea! I would gladly read it. Hell, make a spin-off of this with ANY character you want. I don't mind. **

**Okay...I'm off to plot my next Roach fanfic...I hope you guys enjoyed this and will read my next one!**


End file.
